JHem

All I want is you by me, But how can this be, You’re all that I see, As I run when I flee, I’ll fall and hurt my knee, I’ll cry as you serve me tea. Without you, without glee. With you, with me, I’m free. Those red lips that shine so brightly, They give taste that are of cherry. Just like my favorite scarlet candy. I guess you’re what they call yummy. When you’re here, by me, life’s not so blurry. You’re so warm just like a closely held bunny. It’s as if your heart's made of serene beauty. Without a care in the world that I’m so corny. This will be how I end my diary: Oh, I love how you hold me, baby. I would begin to quiver oh so shyly Yet, you’d embrace me oh so calmly, Woah, you’re now my favorite blankey!

Oh, how I wonder if there’s someone who’ll love me. Someone I can truly love without a sense of pride. Not a girl to call my own, But a girl who feels like home. Just a girl to hold me in her arms, A girl who’s heart is filled with love. Grateful for the moments when our hearts embrace, We’ll cuddle one another with the peace we’ve made. Content and free of worry, we’ll live without great haste, For our bond will withstand even the deepest of fears. Earnestly, we’ll express our love for each other, But not from the heart-wrecking fear of loneliness, But from the absolute vulnerability of being cared for. She’s not mine, yet she'll choose to be there, by my side, Walking hand in hand in the comfort of one another’s presence. Mindfully dancing within the bliss of the unconditional love we’ll share, Our eyes meet, our arms hug, and our lips lay rest with one another’s.

I’m not still, as I’m not formless, unwilling to accept. Unresisting, I am not, for I’m afraid to let it all go. Constrained by my attachments to my beliefs, I suffer for my wishes of how I wish life were. Idea’s cloud my mind, whispering what’s wrong Unable to be still, in the now, anxiety holds me As freedom from concepts still blur out space, Peace of mind becomes hostaged by fear. Why can’t I just let go? Why am I still grasping? Afraid that my mind will tell me I’m inadequate, I hold on to the illusions brought about by thoughts. So my mind chatters endlessly as it craves attention. So, why is it that I simply cannot be like water? Flowing throughout life without resistance? It’s as if the world’s firing at me this horrid test. My mind races fast as peace hides in this mess. I’m falling apart as I seek answers. So, I feel that I must surrender. To this never ending flux I can’t see. For the search itself pains me. There’s no other way than to just be.

You were the one I would pray for, everyday. As you helped me escape the passing days. You were the reason why I would never drop my smile. As my heart was warmed with the gift of your presence. But I’ve come to realize, My joy’s too reliant on you. So I’m going to let it all go, Or I’ll never feel safe at home. As the time passes me by, I feel so alien from my light. So I’ve come here to say, It’s time we went separate ways. As you were the one who shielded me from I. But I won’t keep running away from me. For I’ll never love myself if all I do is look to you. Even though I’m afraid of the days without you, I can’t run away from my own guiding light. Or I’ll never be able to find peace of mind.

Kindness brings out the love in everyone's heart. The gentle light that illuminates darkened pain. Just a simple acknowledgement To turn that frown upside down. Some comfort during brittle times Allows us to heal from inside. This is all we need to push onwards, Towards the scary mist that binds us. Letting go of righteousness to let kindness and gratitude in Begets a calming inner peace resonating from our hearts That’s not afraid of the monsters from within or outwards. Don’t let anger, judgement or justice get in the way of being kind, For everyone struggles from inside, whether noticeable or not. When antagonized by a crying heart, Don’t be consumed by your anger. Let go and do not judge them as evil, For our “justice” will crush their hearts. Be honest, but do not let your ego betray the love of fragile beings. Feel unsettling emotions, so vulnerability and compassion can shine. For we’re all in this together, all beings as one entity among the whole. Don’t be a threat to thos...

Tired of the nights that beat empty, I’m drained of life as the days pass by Lonely from the hole that’s empty of deep intimacy, I feel alienated from the world that feels so faint. Who’s here to comfort me? What’s my life’s purpose? When do I feel protected? Where is love hiding at? How do I begin this quest? Why do I feel so out of sync? The world’s beauty just isn't what it once was. As I see imperfections becoming inadequacies. Cold and empty of color, Life's awe doesn't bloom Vibrantly and vivaciously Since the day I've fallen. The night’s darkness is all I have to hide in solace, For the serenity of light illuminates my despair. Pain is all I hold on to as peace is but a dream To one whose eyes are engulfed by lens of fear, Frightened to look at reality just the way it is. Don’t be quick to assume, For hope has yet to vanish. She’s just hid herself well. When will she come out? Once life’s fully embraced. Both the light and the dark. As the middle path is key.

Forever, I want you to be here, So you can show me you care. I can’t dream of a life of awe without you, So, I pray, that you’ll never leave my side. When you’re here, my dim heart’s darkness subsides, Without you, there’s only fear that binds my timid light. Each unsettling breath I breathe trembles my broken soul, Yet, your gracious presence helps ease the horrid quake. With each and every encounter, My grateful heart whispers, I love you for you, all of you, Silently, I kneel down and pray, I hope you’ll never go away. So, I earnestly ask of you, forever stay by me, I say, as our bond fills me with immense glee. Hold me close in your warm embrace, As you shelter my shivering lips with yours, A kiss that shields my heart from loneliness. With all the love in my anxious heart, I say, Reciprocate, so my heart won’t go astray. Loving your affection brings color to my day.