JHem

I remember saying the wrong thing, But you reassured me with a smile, So why did you go? I remember sharing my feelings, But you never expressed your rile, So why did you go? I remember my truth no longer speaking, But you stayed with me for miles, So why didn't you go? When I'd smile till my teeth start hurting, When your blame was met with agreeing, When fitting in meant no more crying, What did I learn? Love had to be earned. Acceptance had a price. I used disapproval like money. These masks aren't cheap, honey. Everything out of your mouth's so funny!!! Being your butler's a full time job I'm not even given benefits. But I couldn't say I felt robbed. Emotional bills paid selling my innocence. While I never had to worry if you'd leave, It was too late as my heart did.  So while there's discontent, They finally seem pleased. But my soul felt morbid.

"You're kinda like an annoying kid," Following behind like so. Or even a lost puppy. Never quite in view, Never quite on your mind, Never quite gone either. When the light hits just right, You can no longer see me. Or maybe, I'm simply not here. The charismatic may call me problematic, But I'm just trying to keep the scary away. "Face your demons," but maybe... Maybe your demons are your allies. Maybe your demons fight to keep you alive. Maybe your demons scared danger away. They talk like I'm a bad thing, But a defense mechanism is survival. So, I'm tired, of the slander to the shadow.